Straight Talk with Mom.

  • Lady: If you got no money for your bills, you got no money for smokin' weed. You don't see me getting my hair fixed?!?!
  • Lady's grown son: Well, later this week.....
  • Lady: No. It ain't gonna be later this week.
  • Lady's grown son: I'm for real this ain't no way to live.
  • Lady's friend(maybe daughter): He needs to clean his room, clean his closet. He's got brand new clothes, nice clothes. Take them to consignment.
  • Lady: You might be right! You do that, and give me that coin and I will get my hair done this week!

Beware when your mom

  • Lady: If you got no money for your bills, you got no money for smokin' weed. You don't see me getting my hair fixed?!?!
  • Lady's grown son: Well, later this week.....
  • Lady: No. It ain't gonna be later this week.
  • Lady's grown son: I'm for real this ain't no way to live.
  • Lady's friend(maybe daughter): He needs to clean his room, clean his closet. He's got brand new clothes, nice clothes. Take them to consignment.
  • Lady: You might be right! You do that, and give me that coin and I will get my hair done this week!

The sunshine really gets to me.

I mean, on the phone just now I said “Everything’s okay. I have few wants and all of my needs are met.”  I mean, if you know me, that is some weird shit to hear coming out of my face.

So listen to this in honor of my awesome good mood, for who knows how long it shall last.

The last bastion of good taste.

  • me: ....so he wants a La-Z Boy or something to get vertical on but I told him we'd have to wait until the perfect one comes along. I mean it's not like we have Frasier's apartment where everything is super nice and it can support one awful piece of furniture.
  • sister/voice of reason: That was HIS FATHER. That SERVED OUR COUNTRY. What has your husband done to deserve an ugly chair?

Props to you dude

in the white Chrysler Sebring convertible flying down Chicago Ave. at about a million miles an hour, top down, jamming some Twista.  Usually I’d think you’re an asshole, but if you can do that shit in January, IN CHICAGO, that’s cause for applause. 

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I’m not ashamed to admit

That the infomercial for Dean Martin’s Celebrity Roasts is one of my fave shows.

Ever.

paint a rainbow.

my little pony baby pony dance.

required viewing.


Apparently this pick up line works

Dude: Yeah I think I remember you from Rainbo.

Girl that’s too old to be called a girl: Wow!(hair pushed behind ear) yeah…

She later told me “I can’t believe he remembers me from RAINBO!”

I audibly rolled my eyes.

image via